HAPPY HOLIDAYS TO ALL

To all my Family & Friends,
WOW! It's feels like forever since I've been here. First I would like to say that I trust that everyone had a Very Blessed Christmas and your New Year will be Merry and Bright!!! A lot has happened since I last posted, it has been busy busy busy around here and along with all the business there have been a lot of good things happening and some sad but I will just mention a few. One good thing that took place was the kids Church Christmas play, it was a big highlight for the Holiday Season at our Church and it came together beautifully as the children were such troopers having to do the play not but 1 time but for both of our Sunday morning services. The kids were quit eager for their school's Christmas parties as well as they were for their holiday break. One thing that I had a hard time doing is sending them to their father's in Ohio for part of their break. I have never awakened on a Christmas morning since I have been a mother and found my home empty without the excitement and laughter of my 3 gifts that God has entrusted me with. It was something that I don't look forward to ever again. God gave me strength that I didn't know I had and I was able to pull through plus I thank God for other blessings in my life that helped me get through Christmas Eve as well... you know who you are! I get them back this Friday for New Years Eve and I am thrilled! I miss them so much!
I also wanted to mention that I am dating a wonderful man named Brian. He has been a great deal of support and encouragement to me and I look forward to our time spent together and I can't wait for you all to meet him! He has a adorable little boy who is 4 years old whom I can't wait for you to meet as well! I will update you more at a later time! Well I sure would love to hear back from my family and friends and see what you've been up to and how your holidays were. Take care and I pray that you stay safe and blessed throughout the holidays! Many Blessings & Love to all ~Leslie

*2 MONTHS AGO TODAY*

It has been almost a month since my last blog and a lot has happened around here. It would take up too much space on here and I don't have the time or the memory to recall everything that has happened either... boy aren't I the brilliant one! LOL

2 months ago today I said good-bye to my father, Wilson Holloway. I have been missing him so much here lately and I am at a loss for words to explain the sadness that I feel knowing that I can't pick up the phone to call him, expecting him to answer, hear his voice and just simply ask him for advice on some mechanical issues that I am having with my car. I know that he isn't in pain anymore and that cancer no longer consumes his physical body since Jesus took him home to Heaven... and for that I wouldn't even want to bring him back, but I am his daughter, I am human and I miss him terribly. I think that sometimes we try to protect our hearts from pain... it still didn't seem real to me that dad is gone and I think that a part of me hadn't really come to terms with it or allowed myself to grieve, but with Thanksgiving just passed us and without being able to call dad or see him and another holiday which is my favorite-Christmas rapidly approaching I am just really struggling with grasping that he is no longer here. I do have friends here but I don't want to burden them as they are busy with their jobs, families and just life... so when I need a hug or just a friend to listen to me, I can cry out to Jesus... and He will hold me till the pain subsides. When my heart has is aching so bad with pain and I feel like I can't go on, the best I can do is ask Jesus to take the wheel!
P.S. Check out the new pictures on my site.

*LAY IT DOWN*

I recently sang a special song for our Wednesday night prayer meeting. I had no idea what the preacher was going to preach about but I really felt impressed to sing the song "LAY IT DOWN" and as I started practicing it, I knew more and more that I was suppose to sing it. There are so many times in my own personal life that I have just wanted to be in control instead of giving it to Jesus, the One who knows our hearts and needs even before we know that we are in need. Some of the words say, So I'm gonna lay it down- I'm gonna learn to trust You now, what more can I do, everything I am depends on You- and if the sun don't come back up- You know Your love will be enough- I'm gonna let it be, gonna let it go, gonna lay it down. I am asking God to remind me that when I want to be in control and not surrender my burdens on Him or just forget who I am in comparison to Who He is, what He has already done, and still can do for me, He will remind me that He is all about picking up whatever we are willing to lay down. I pray that you will give all of your concerns, cares and burdens to Jesus. ~Blessings

*PATIENCE*

...is one of the many things in the many areas of my life that I really need God's help with! He's still working on me, to make me what I ought to be. Just a line to a song I remember from childhood that is so true for me even as an adult.

Anyways the reason for my blog is just to say hello to all friends and family out there and to say that I was messing with my site and opps, I guess that I was so clueless that I was actually deleting some of my favorite pictures that I had posted here and now they are history and I have to start all over again. Oh well, that is what I am talking about when I say patience. I was reading my sister Bev's blog and I got the bright idea to change my template because I had wanted to for some time now, but when she said that she lost some of her things, I just took that as she made a simple error and pushed a wrong button or something of that sort... well I must of done the same thing. So PATIENT is just what I am going to have to be in order to restore some of my favorites that I used to have. So please be patient with me and I will get things back to life on here soon!

In closing I just wanted to mention that I appreciate all your thoughts and prayers for my family during our time of loss and grief. Thank- You and God Bless! ~Many Blessings

*PSALM 51:10-12*

Create in me a clean heart, Oh God And renew a steadfast spirit within me. Do not cast me away from Your presence, And do not take Your Holy Spirit from me. Restore unto me the joy of Your salvation, And uphold me by Your generous Spirit. Psalm 51:10-12 NKJV

I have had the privilege of attending the 2nd annual Missionary Conference at our Church this weekend. It started on Friday night and will continue through tomorrow morning. It has been quite interesting and yet fulfilling to see the work that God is doing in the lives of people who were or was once lost. Pastor Jeff challenged us to pray about what we can do for missions and to keep an open heart to God if He is calling us into missionary work of any kind. He and a few others from our church went to the Ukraine a few weeks ago. That is a place that has always intrigued me, but anyways he said that he believes everyone should at least once in their lifetime take a trip to another country. He also states that if you do, you will come back a changed person. I am sure you can imagine some of the reasons why but I won't post it right now. God wants us to step outside of our comfort zones and reach out to the lost and dying world. If we simply keep to ourselves because we don't want someone to see us socializing with the lost, then what will we have done to further advance the kingdom of heaven. I want Jesus to create in me a clean heart and renew the right kind of spirit in me so that when the opportunity arises they will see Christ-like holiness within me! Are you going to step outside your comfort zone in order to make a difference. Many Blessings, Leslie

*A BIT OF CATCHING UP*

I still can't believe that it has been a little over 2 weeks ago that I said goodbye to my father. I am still in disbelief that he is no longer with us. We are heading back to Florida in the morning for dad's funeral and memorial service and it just feels that since we are heading to Florida that when we get there, dad is one of the people that I should be seeing upon arriving. But as I sit here thinking about this, I am quickly reminded that dad has ended his suffering and journey here on earth and he is now with all others who have gone on before. I guess I didn't really say goodbye to dad, but more like- see you soon! I can't wait till the day when there will be no more night, no more pain, no more tears, never crying in vain, but praises to the Great I Am, and we will forever live in the light of the risen Lamb. Please keep my family in your prayers as we all meet to remember dad (Wilson F. Holloway) . We have family/friends coming from all over. There is going to be a memorial service at the church dad attended on Thursday the 25th and then the burial will with the Veterans in St. Petersburg on Friday the 26th. Some from Arizona, Pennsylvania, New York, Ohio, North Carolina, Virgina and maybe a few more states. I pray that we all draw close together as a family and that we remember that Jesus is right beside us and He isn't going anywhere. Even when I am unaware and not worthy of His mercy, He is always faithful. I have found that Jesus is always faithful and I want my life to reflect Christ likeness (holiness) so that others will see and want the same Jesus that I have. Jesus is giving me peace over great grief and loss and I know that when my grief becomes to much for me to bear, He is always faithful to comfort me. Are we allowing Jesus to do the job that God sent Him to do? I love and miss you dad!

*RISING ABOVE GRIEF- REMEMBERING MY DAD, WILSON HOLLOWAY*

I begin this blog with a very heavy heart. This is by far the hardest post that I have ever done! Most of you may already know that my dear father's 7 year battle with cancer ended here on earth @ 7pm Saturday October 6, 2007. He is no longer fighting the disease of cancer that had overtaken his body. He entered into an everlasting journey and was given the perfect healing that comes from personally knowing Jesus and by determining to live his life for the One Who Created him! My heart is breaking with grief, but I wouldn't want him to come back to this life and suffer another minute. I know where my strength comes from and my family and I are relying upon Jesus for the strength it will take daily to get through. My family truly have been blessed by the words of encouragement, generous acts of kindness, and all the food given to each of us throughout this very sad loss! We can't say thank you enough for keeping us in your thoughts and prayers! Again I say thank- you! I can't promise, but I will try to keep you posted and keep my blog updated. Funeral arrangements have been set up for October 25-26, 2007. For further information please go to www.caringbridge.com and look up Wilson Holloway. God Bless you all! Leslie ~I love you and miss you dearly, Dad~
Oh I almost forgot...my father's story about his farmall tractors and how he made the cover page for Farm and Ranch Living Magazine's September Issue can also be checked out there as well as going to www.farmandranchliving.com (where he is on the cover for sept issue and a small write up on him is in the following issue, the issue with the cows on the front) or go to www.highlandstoday.com where he made bottom of the front page on October 6, 2007 (Highlands is their local newspaper the title to look for is A Farmer And His Farmall- Wilson Holloway)

*MY DAD*

I just wanted to stop and take the time and post a blog that is very dear and close to my heart. I don't know if many of you know that my father was diagnosed with colon cancer in 2000, and since that time he's had 2 major surgeries and many chemotherapy treatments. In early 2007, Hospice was called in to help my mom care for dad and the house and to give my mom a chance to do work that she can't do at home. Mom is a LPN and she is able to do some of her work from home so she can be with dad. Hospice has been a blessing! Please keep mom in your prayers... with help and strength from God, she has been so strong, courageous and a wonderful wife and caregiver to my father. This picture was taken yesterday September 16, 2007. My father is down to 143 pounds, and he looks very nice in his shirt and tie. I am not sure if any of you have ever heard me talk about Caringbridge.org? It is a free website that supports and connects family, friends and the ones we love during critical illnesses. You can read updates about your loved one and even leave a comment of encouragement for them to read. I highly recommend it, it has made us able to still feel connected even though many miles separate us. For more information go to www.caringbridge.org
Before I close, I wanted to mention again that I am so proud of my dad. His picture made the front page of the September issue of Farm and Ranch Living (magazine). He is pictured there with one of his Farmall tractors. In dad's spare time as his favorite hobby, he would buy old tractors (Farmalls) and restore and paint them. I will always remember having quite a few Farmall's around the house. Dad also loved to fix them up and participate in local tractor pulls... and he always did quite well! (especially against those old JohnDeere's). He was involved with the Florida Flywheelers and I believe the last time he pulled was earlier this summer. I have many memories of watching dad from the grand stand and seeing him pull his way down the track and many times it was a first place pull for his class. As I'm sitting here posting... I also want to say that as much as I know dad loves his red Farmalls, he loves his Heavenly Father and Jesus much more! I appreciate all the thoughts and prayers for my dad and our family, please continue to pray that my dad will feel great comfort in God's Everlasting Arms. Thank You Dad for the memories, ~I Love You~

*INVESTMENT THAT'S WELL WORTH IT*

I have meant to put this picture of the kids on here before now, but as slippery as my mind is... well need I say more? Anyways, this was a first for all of them to wear uniforms to school. It's the first time for Kristofer and Katie to attend a Christian School but Kyle started out his schooldays at a Christian School back in Ohio from Preschool up to Thanksgiving break his second grade year, where he (they) attended public school till this year. Kyle is a freshman, Kris is in 5th and Katie is in 3rd. One thing that I find a little humorous... almost every morning Kris asks me why he has to wear the same kind of shirt? I tell him the same reason over again, but with his Autism (Asperger's Syndrome) it's really bothers him that all the shirts look alike and the only difference is that they get to wear 8 different colors. I thank God that I still have the freedom to choose where to send my kids to school. My heart breaks for the people of this world who don't get to enjoy the freedom that our country has. I want to be more Thankful for what I've been given, complain a lot less and always remember from Whom my Blessings come from.

*MAKING PROGRESS*

Before I forget, this is a picture of the house we are renting. I took this off my cell phone so it isn't of good quality, but I hope you are able to make it out!

Tomorrow night the Children Of The World Choir is going to be at our Church to sing, dance etc. These are an amazing group of young children who each has a story to tell. I am really looking forward to seeing this group of innocent kids come together, putting aside their differences whether it be back rounds, race, culture, talents and whatever seperates them each individually to worship and bring forth a message that will obviously bear signs of a UNITY that our world so desperately needs, second to God! This is the main reason for this post.

As I look back and remember where I was this time a month ago and see where I'm at today, I sure want to be sure to thank everyone that helped me get to where I'm at... and that goes for everyone who gave any type of help during our move. I can say that we are settling nicely into our home, although I know it takes time to unpack everything I am trying not to let it get to me too bad! So when I look back and remember where I was when I first started this transition for our lives, I can say that we have truly made progress.

As I am sitting here typing this, oodles of thoughts are racing through my mind... and I remember visiting here around this time last year and knowing that in about a year I would be here where we are at, but couldn't even begin to imagine just how far God brought the kids and I. I have learned to trust in Him more. I have always been a "doubting Thomas and for a change I was walking out in faith, stepping back and fully trusting God to lead me. So when I look back to a year ago I really do know that I have made progress!

Again I am taken back to 6 years ago today and I am still shaken by the horrific events that took place in New York, Pennsylvania and the Pentagon. My heart mourns along with the millions whose lives were directly and indirectly affected that day. I have the deepest respect for the heroic efforts of those who served in any way that day and those who gave their lives unselfishly to save the lives of others, and all the men and women who serve our country everyday so that we are still able to experience freedom in so many different ways. May we no longer allow the hatred that is infesting our world today to destroy anymore lives and may we bring God back to every area of our lives and allow Him to bring about a change in each and everyone of our hearts so that sin and hatred will be a thing of the past. May we allow Jesus to bring peace to this world that He came to save! So if we look back on September 11, 2001, are we able to say that things look better today than they did then? Have we made progress and if not... what can we do to bring about a change. I pray that God will give me a heart that is broken for the lost and dying in this world, until then we may never see a change. ~Blessings

*JUST A LITTLE CRAZINESS CONTINUES*

Things have been CRAZY around here but I am ready to see some signs of "normal"... if there is or ever will be such a thing again! But through it all I can say that things have been going pretty good!

The kids are adjusting to school and doing quite well! This is the first time ever that I have heard Kristofer say that the kids at his school like him. He went up to his teacher last week and said to her, Mrs. Wilmoth, I am a little worried. She said how so Kris, and he said, well there is a girl here that told me that she likes me. And the teacher told him, Kris that's good that kids like you, and he said, oh I didn't know that. Everywhere else we have gone Kris has never felt like he belonged or was made to feel like he belonged or could feel comfortable enough to fit into his surroundings. So when the devil or others try to make me feel like that sending my kids to a Christian school isn't worth it, I can firmly say that is absolutely not true! It has always been very important to me that no matter where my kids went to school, they feel safe and comfortable... and I believe now that both of those needs for the kids are being fulfilled! Thank-you God!

At an early age I knew that I was to do something with music, whether it is to write, record, sing or simply minister... I didn't realize till I was much older that God just wanted me to use the gift He gave me for Him. Yesterday I had a try out/audition with our music leader here at our new church... and I get to start practicing with the worship team this coming Sunday! As we all know, in life we will always be disappointed by others who can be unkind or stand in the way of us using the talents God has given to us, but I know from personal experience that having great patience pays off! I now know that God had bigger and better plans for me than I could have for myself... His timing is always PERFECT!!!

Our new church really has a good focus for our young children and youth. Katie and Kris are plugged into the children's church and Kyle has fit in nicely to the youth. The teen ministry here is focused on leading our generation of Youth to Christ! The teen ministry is also known as "Soul Changers". This is an awesome outreach to the youth in our area. The teens get to lead church service as well as the worship music. After Sunday morning worship, everyone involved with the youth meets back at the church by 3:00 and they load up the church bus to capacity(approx 60-65 youth) and head out for a 30-40 minute drive up the mountain to a little country church in a town called Copper Hill. First they have worship music that is lead by the band and then one of the Youth Pastors brings the message. Afterwards they eat and have a lot of fun activities planned. I had the opportunity to go with them last week and it was really awesome to see the church packed out and the youth worshiping. The prior week they had approx 63 youth and 8 out of the 63 gave their hearts to Christ! That is awesome!!! Kyle had his first experience playing the lead guitar along with another youth who already plays the lead in the band. He was asked to join the "teen worship band". He is thrilled! He has waited a long time for this moment and I was elated to be able to be there and see it happen. He had really been practicing a lot and playing well over the summer and has improved tremendously! He really did a good job for the first time and was asked to be a part of the new band that they are looking to start in the near future. I took the picture posted on this blog from my cell phone and it isn't real clear and I do apologize that it isn't good, but I can't find my digital camera since we moved. (Kyle is in the green shirt)

Anyways, for now that's an overview of what's been happening here. When I get more settled I will be able to post more often. We have church tonight and I gotta keep busy! Blessings to All! :-)

*2 WEEKS DOWN - ONLY A ZILLION MORE TO GO*

It is hard to believe that the kids have finished their 2nd full week of school! I am still baffled that this is September 1st and that means winter,Thanksgiving and Christmas are just around the corner and will be here before we know it... and I am absolutely not even ready to think about the holidays!!!
The kiddies don't have school on Monday due to Labor Day and I believe that we are going to try to have a picnic of some sort with my brother and his family. My Uncle Joe and Aunt Charlene are coming in tomorrow to finish bringing me the rest of my stuff that wouldn't fit into my rental truck so they'll will get to be here for it, I hope! I don't know what the menu is for Monday but I bought a watermelon when I was at Kroger's last night. (I started craving it the minute I walked in the door and saw it sitting there-isn't that pathetic? Oh dear)

Well I haven't got much time here to blog today. There is a lot of things that I could go unpack,clean or organize... so to be able to look back on the day and feel a small bit of accomplishment...I must keep this short in order to stay focused and busy.

I hope everyone has a pleasant day, but most importantly don't be too busy to stop and listen to God in the quiet! You will be amazed at how much you will notice Him there among the silence!

~Blessings To All~

*IT'S SURE BEEN ONE GREAT ADVENTURE*

I can hardly believe that it has almost been 3 weeks since I last posted and all I can say is "WOW", where has the time gone? These past few weeks have been such a great adventure- with lots of awesome happenings as well as not so awesome... but we managed to pull through and God has given us the strength to do so!

I am finally in my new home. It turned out that I was able to connect with an awesome landlord here that someone in our new church hooked me up with. We have a 3 bedroom brick ranch,(Kyle has claimed a basement room that I was going to use as a game room as a 4th bedroom) not too much yard space which is a bit different from our home in Dover, but it is nice and it will be easy to care for. The hardest part so far for me has been trying to unpack everything pretty much on my own. My new friend Karla from the singles group came over one night last week and she helped us get our living room situated. Thanks Karla! Kyle has been helping when he can.

The kids started school last Monday. (Aug. 20) They are almost finished with their first 2 weeks of school. The transition from public to private school has been relatively easy for them so far, and they all seem to like the switch. Please keep them in your prayers as the year continues on.

Kyle turned 15 on Sunday. I can hardly believe it, but my little Kyle will be able to get his permit in 6 months, depending on how well he behaves. Now I didn't say that because I have problems with him, but there is a lot of responsibilities that comes with driving, such as saving money for the insurance, testing fees, responsibility for school and at home and so on. I will keep you updated if and when that new phase takes place. (someone help) Kyle has been getting a lot of experience here playing his guitar and he has really taken off on learning a lot of songs. He was asked just this past Sunday if he would help start a second band that would alternate weeks to play or fill in when someone wasn't there. This was great Birthday news for him. He has waited a long time to be able to do this and now to see it take shape is exciting for him.

The children's choir director here at Parkway House Of Prayer went around and listened to the kids sing last Wednesday night... I guess she did this without them knowing what she was listening for and Sunday she asked me if I would allow Katie to have one of the many main lead parts? This would include a part to memorize, a solo and some dancing. Of course I said yes and it has been fun so far learning the parts right with her. I know I might be a bit prejudice as we all are when it comes to our own children but when Katie sings I can't help but be filled with joy! She really has almost perfect pitch for an eight year old. I just hope and pray that she continues to use her voice and talents for God! Kris is going to be a part of the children's choir that sings at the Christmas program.

Since I have my computer back I will again be stopping in reading and commenting on all the blogs I used to visit and who knows, maybe some more new ones!

Before I close I would like to say that I appreciate all the thoughts and prayers for me and my family as we stepped out in faith and followed God as He led us here to Virginia. I do miss all my friends and family back in Ohio and I really really miss some people that probably didn't even realize it or know I cared. (Smile) My only regret is that I couldn't bring you all here with me! To all of you, much love and hugz! Thank you for also keeping my father in your prayers. He is ever so ready and patiently waiting to go home to Heaven. Mom has been keeping us updated and I am thankful that Dad has her there with him as a constant, faithful, loving and compassionate wife! Thank you Mom, I love you both!

Well I know that I could post more but my mind has gone blank about what I wanted to post, it's almost midnight and I really need to get some more clothes hung in someone's closet somewhere around here- so I better stay busy before I decide not to and regret it in the morning.

Blessings to All

*A QUICK OVERVIEW*

I just wanted to take a few minutes and let you all know that I will possibly be out of the blog world for a few days or weeks depending on how fast the move and transition take place. Anyways, feel free to email me or leave a comment and I will get back to you as soon as I get settled. I am turning my pc off and packing it away in the next hour or so. sniff sniff ( I am so going to miss the luxury of DSL for awhile) We are heading out for Virginia tomorrow morning after the rental truck is loaded. Blessings To All!

*IT'S BEEN SIMPLY CRAZY AROUND HERE*

Well I am not quite sure that I know just how to begin this post but here goes....

I left July 15th for Virginia to pick up Kyle and was soposed to spend only a week there, but my car broke down and I ended up spending an extra week there before I could make it back to Ohio. After I finally went home 2 weeks later, I ended up going back 6 days later and spent another 4 days there and now I am back in Ohio... but I am leaving this coming Saturday, heading back to Virginia for the last time. Whew! I still can't believe that I am doing this, but God sure is awesome and He had bigger plans for me than I could of envisioned myself. The best part of all this is that I just told God that I was going to go ahead and take that leap of faith, give Him control and whatever He wanted for my life, I was willing to obey. I have such a renewed faith in God and there is no possible way that anyone or anything could ever tell me that God isn't faithful! I have had the chance to just sit back for once and watch God at work, and it is in my own life! He told me to let Him have control and He would never fail me! I am totally amazed and absolutely thankful! Thank- You God! My brother and sister-n-law are coming up and helping me get everything loaded up in the moving truck and then we will make the 5 hour trip back down through the mountains to Roanoke, Virginia. I will still be updating my blogspot account, but it might be a few days or a week before I get in another posting, especially after this coming weekend. The kids are excited and at the same time sad that they will be leaving their neighbors behind, well and their dog that my mom took for us when the Doctor said that Katie couln't be around her anymore. They are starting school on August 20 and I have got 1 week after we get there to get everything ready to go for that.

I better go get some more packing done... I am at this dreaded task alone tonight since my kids went to spend this evening with their dad. Blessings to All!

*WHERE DID THE TIME GO?*

Hello my dear Family and Friends,
Good Grief... I can hardly believe that it has almost been a whole month since I last posted, and what a month it has been. I don't even know where to begin, so I will just start with whatever pops into my head first and even if I go back and forth to a subject and my blogging is out of order... In advance, please forgive me and who's really checking for proper grammar anyways? LOL (not me, I'm normally not like that, sometimes a bit on the Obsessive Compulsive side)

I hope that all my friends and family wherever you may be, have been well since I blogged or spoke to you last!

Many of you have asked about my father and I wanted to say that he is still here with us and that he is getting weaker everyday. My family and I appreciate all your thoughts and prayers during this difficult time and I can't thank- you enough. We serve an Awesome God who is always willing and able to give comfort when needed! I also wanted to say that I am so proud of my father... his picture made the front cover of Farm and Ranch Living Magazine for the August/September issue. (www.farmandranchliving.com) He is pictured on the cover with his red Farm All Super M. The picture was taken at the Florida Fly Wheelers where my dad so often came in first place in the tractor pulls in the class he would pulled in (THERE'S NOTHING QUITE LIKE A JOHN DEERE... UNTIL A FARMALL IS NEAR! as quoted to me by my nephew, Todd) I love you dad and I'm so proud of you!!!

As most of you already know... I am taking a huge leap of faith and in the next few weeks myself and my 3 children will be making a move to Roanoke, Virginia. I have so many people here that I am going to miss terribly... and you all know who you are! I have family and friends that I have known for almost 20 years where I am going... this is why it is so hard for me to make this post and one of the many reasons why I haven't been able to post for awhile. I have an awesome church family that I have grown to love more than they could possibly imagine and it is going to be so hard to have to say "see you sometime soon", because I could never say goodbye. Tonight at church it was so hard to hold back the tears or emotions, or even look people in the eye, but I was able to hold it together the entire service... then I just had to go home. Well enough of this for now or I will need to get my tissues.

While I was in Virginia, I had a freaky thing happen to my car. The right front spring broke and punctured a hole in my new tire. Now at the time one might think that I was the victim of some silly teens playing a prank since we were at camp and my sister-n-law also had a flat tire. But that was definitely not the case. I had to have my car towed down the mountain the final day of camp, then waited 10 days before my brother had a free day from work to fix it. I can say that God sure was looking out for the kids and I because if this would of happened while driving, we might not be here!

Because of our extra week in Roanoke, Kyle was able to attend another youth camp. He went with the new church we will be attending and headed for AYC aka Appalachian Youth Challenge in Pennsylvania. Man did he ever do some traveling this summer! Just ask him about it. He was gone for a month.

Kristofer is away at Camp Nuhop. (www.campnuhop.org) I believe that this was his 5th year there. This year he chose to attend science camp so while there, they are taking 3 day trips to Cleveland to go to the Science Center, Cleveland Zoo, and the Natural History Museum.

I really miss my daughter! I left her with my brother and sister-n-law in Virginia so that I could bring my niece and nephew with me to help pack things up. We are heading back to Virginia on Saturday after I pick Kris up from Nuhop. I will be coming back to Ohio till about the end of August and then making our move. I do have until the end of September so if I have to wait till then I do have the time. If anyone would like to have a packing party or just to hang out and chat with me... please feel free to stop in or give me a holler!

I apologize that I don't have any pictures to post at this time, but every time I tried to use my digital camera, the batteries wouldn't hold up and I kept replacing them with new ones. I sure hope that nothing is wrong with my cam, but such is my luck! grrr

Well I could go on and on, but I think that I will rest my brain for a bit. I will post more soon! Blessings to All! Leslie

*HE SURE PULLED MY HEART STRINGS!*

Well one thing I know for sure is that I am not even close to being ready for my yard sale, but come Thursday morning I will try to be ready for it as much as I possibly can. Or better yet, maybe if I just don't think about it the yard sale will all go away and I will have sold everything there is to sell and I will have the money that goes along with the sales. Dream On!!! I only have my middle child here with me this week and you would think that it would of been easier to get boxes gone through and priced, NOT! This is me I'm talking about and that would not even be in this lifetime!

Anyways after taking Kris to his Dr.'s appointment this afternoon I mozied on over to my mom and step dads I stayed a lot longer than I should of and before I knew it- it was time to go get Kris some dinner and get ready for my Massotherapy appointment. But I lucked out when my step dad asked us to stay there for dinner and with not too much twisting here, so I agreed to stay and we ordered pizza. Now I like pizza but have to be in the mood for it... I just can't have it all the time. As for chicken...well that is a dish that I truly love and a totally different post. LOL

After dinner and on the way to my appointment I noticed that Kristofer was especially quiet and he wouldn't even answer me when I tried to talk to him. So I asked him what was wrong for the 10th time and he finally said, "I didn't like that way you talked to Abby tonight"(our dog who now lives at my moms) Well I scolded our dog because she tried to make her way to scarf down my step dads pizza and after he lost a philly steak sub to her a few weeks back, I didn't want to see it happen to him or her again, so I just told Abby no in a stern voice as she was ready to pounce on it. After he told me this I asked him, and do you miss her? And that is all it took... he burst into tears and they wouldn't stop. Along with me scolding her and him missing her, Kris was taken by emotions. Now you have to understand, Kris is not one to really show that side of him... His Asperger's Syndrome (Autism) makes it hard for him to show emotions other than what often is interpreted as him being a bad boy or what some deem as inappropriate. I am so proud of him that he was able to let an emotion out and without anger, screaming or someone being in the way of his frustrations. Since my daughter is highly allergic to Abby giving her fits with her asthma and since she is away at camp with the group from Velocity (church group)... I agreed to bring Abby home tonight and let her stay as long as he helps me do the extra cleaning (sweeping furniture in and out and running sweeper more than once) that has to be done after she goes back to mom's... and so against my better judgment Abby is here for the night. I guess the little stinker still knows how to pull on my heart stings! ~Blessings~

*CATCHING UP*

I just wanted to pause long enough from my busy life to post even if it is short.

I missed church this morning and I really regret not being able to be there. I hate not being able to go... I really look forward in going to renew myself after a busy week and to hear a message that always seems to be taylor-made just for me that week. Church is such an important part of my life as a Christ Follower. It's funny now looking back to when I wasn't following Christ, I didn't even think about going to church or what day of the week it was... I just simply lived my life but now it is like a piece of my puzzle is missing and I have to search for it even harder when I am not there. Sorry for the bad example... but I couldn't think of anything else at the moment. Grrr

This week has flown by so fast! Kyle has been gone for just over a week now and I miss him terribly! He is visiting my brother and family in Roanoke, Va. and I leave on the 14th to pick him up and stay for about a week to visit and take care of some business... kind of like a short vacation. I might not be coming back in a week if my dad passes away while I'm there. We will head on to Florida for his burial.

Katie leaves for camp bright and early tomorrow morning. This is her first time ever to go to any camp alone with no other family there but I trust that she will do fine! Jessica is her counselor and she knows her well!

Kristofer leaves for Camp Nuhop in Perrysville, Ohio at the end of this month through the first week of August... he has been going to this camp for 5 years now. He is especially excited since it is his first time to attend the Science camp they offer that teaches them so many different things about nature. (even holding snakes, eeeeekkk!)

I trust that you all had an enjoyable holiday week! I will post some pictures of the 4th and last nights fireworks at Tuscora Park at a later time.

Please keep my father and family in your thoughts and prayers- it will be very soon now. Blessings, Leslie

P.S. It was short after all! :-)

*MY ALL SO CRAZY LIFE- AS I KNOW IT*

First I want to apologize in advance because this post might be long! It seems like forever since I last posted but actually it's only been a week. So I guess my life's been way too busy... which brings me the thoughts for today's posts. I know that sometimes throughout my own "ALL SO CRAZY LIFE" I can get caughted up or just simply overwhelmed with all there is to do or should be done. I try my hardest to be organized... but I have this lovely little thing called Adult ADD sometimes... no really I have it all the time, so organization eludes me! I will find myself making up lists, and knowing that there is umteen million things to do I just try to start with the top 5 - 10 most important things to get done and by a certain date. You'd think that with a list one should be able to follow it no problem, right? WRONG!!! I have no idea how I have managed to start on all 5 - 10 things and in no particular order... but by my deadline I still only have 2-3 fully completed! GRRR! Why can't I just stick to 1 thing and keep at it till it's finished?? I don't have a clue, or why can't I remember to go right back to it if I am sidetracked for some unknown reason I can't remember! Is getting sidetracked due to kids needing me, the telephone ringing or just being so consumed with the silly list and life that before I realize it, it's past 3:00 and I haven't even fed the kids lunch and the "it's now about time to start dinner frenzy" suddenly hits me, where do I put the blame? I often feel like Charlie Brown when he tried so hard to kick the football and failed time and again landing on his bootie... he always tried- that's what counts! Do any of you other mothers out there feel like this? Am I the only one that feels like I fail at completing my household tasks or duties as a mother trying to be both mother and example ? Am I teaching my children proper life skills? I pray that I am, but at times I feel so SCATTERBRAINED!!! Having said all of this, I believe that I just might have stumbled upon a cure for us Adult ADD-ers! (or at least for myself) You know how they make these invisible boundary fences for our animals? Well if dogs can be trained, why can't I? Yes I am talking "Shock collars here".... but for humans! More like "Our Reminder or Thinking Necklaces"! (The Human Zapper-comes in gold or silver) Us women always like getting new jewelry don't we.... just think of it as replacing the ribbon around our finger to remember sort of thing, but just a pretty necklace might be more charming, don't ya think so? LOL Just once it would feel gr8 to be able to get a list of things done starting with #1-10 without all the stops and starts and then be able to see what I've accomplished! I know that sounds quite *Barbaric* and that I am not! I don't suggest inflicting harm or injury to anyone... it's just that sometimes my sense of humor does about as much wandering as my mind does and I would just love to find a solution to my problem even though the idea might be warped, it's just a thought! (*Smile*) So having said all this I feel quite a bit better! Blogging does help calm the mind! Guess that is why the experts suggest journaling and my love for writing! I guess that I am too hard on myself and my own worst critic. But ever since following Christ and the difference He has made in my life, I should just allow Him to "Shock" the reality back into me if He feels it's necessary! Are we all needing a good *Shocking*? Blessings To All!

*BITS & PIECES FROM ALIVE 07*

A
L
I
V
E
FESTIVAL 2007

Seems like it's been forever since I've last posted, but I took a short, much needed vacation and since my kids are with their dad until this coming Friday...this post will explain my absenteeism. (that sounds so not like a word, but it didn't fall under the spell check, lol) Wow! That is a word that I used quite often this past week! I went to my first ever ALIVE Festival! It was not only the first time to hear and see so many wonderful speakers, singers, talent and true worship... but it was a first for me to go camping. OK, don't start laughing! LOL I just have never been camping in my entire life and I will have to say that I really enjoyed it!!! There was so many bands that I have only heard the names of and I was so impressed with them after it was their time to shine, that I left ALIVE feeing just that... ALIVE!!! I can really say that I believe Chris Tomlin writes his songs from daily having a personal relationship with God! He blew me away with his heart for worship and his sincere desire to lead others to Christ! Another group that I felt was truly sincere was a very young group called Leeland. This is a group that I had heard a lot about, but I had never knew or didn't think that I knew any of their music. I guess I knew one, just never connected the song with the band. Anyways, the lead singer is another that has a heart for the unchurched and lost! He told of the opportunity he had to share the gospel with a much older man (in his 50's or 60's) that eventually came to know Christ, and Leeland said that he never dreamed that a 19 year old would have that impact on a much older man, but it proves that Jesus can work wonders through us no matter what the age may be, as long as we are the willing vessels! His testimony is fabulous and he is only 19... I cannot wait for more to come from this young worship group! Barlow Girl's testimony was absolutely sensational... their heart for reaching out to young girls (and older) teaching the importance of modesty and that purity is worth the wait and it's okay not to date since God already has someone out there for everyone, we just need to let it be in God's time and up to Him when it happens. There was just so many awesome groups and speakers that I could of sat for hours and listened to. Speakers that I would recommend were Crystal Miller (survivor from the Columbine shootings), David Nassar (former Middle East resident with a WOW! testimony) and James Ryle ( former prison inmate). I know there were a lot more, these are just a few that stood out to me.

I apologize for this messed up blog, but I just cannot figure out how to stack the pics and post beside it so that it don't take up so much wasted space... it just wouldn't work for me no matter what way I tried to align it. I guess I need to take some lessons in computers? Anyways, this is what has been happening in my neck of the woods, let me know about yours! God Bless! Leslie

*HEAVY HEART*

In the past 2 days I have found myself very overwhelmed and emotional! I just haven't been able to bring myself to post for the past few days because rather than say a lot of things that may or may not make sense, I've also not been able to put into words what I want to say. (sometimes this ADD thing can be so annoying)

My kids left today for a 2 week vacation with their Dad and I will get to see them since they will also be at the Alive concert that I am attending for my very first time. I have never been away from my kids for that length of time and I guess that would have to play a part in my saddened state of mind. (Except for Kyle when my dad took him down south with him)

Most of you probably already know that my Dad is in his final days of life after battling cancer since 2000. I did get to talk to him yesterday and he sounded better than he had a few days before that... but I guess I know that it won't be much longer, and even though I know, somehow it hadn't registered till yesterday about how soon that I will be getting that phone call that no one wants to hear! My Mom belongs to a website that allows family and friends to stay in contact during a real crucial time in someone's life. The name of the site is www.caringbridge.com It has helped keep our family and friends updated on what has been going on. I sat down tonight with a heavy heart and started to check my email and found that my mom had updated with a new post. Mom wrote that her and Dad are requesting our prayers because Dad is showing more signs and symptoms of going home to Heaven. She also says that in the past week he is steadily loosing strength and weight, has no appetite and there has been a major decline in his health. He can no longer tinker with his hobbies- tractors. Moms work has allowed her to work from home and have supplied her with the means to do so because Dad isn't well enough to be left alone.

The questions that I keep asking God is how? How do you I find comfort in times of great overwhelming sadness and grief? Why do people that we love and care about have to leave? Why did this have to happen to my Dad or anyones Dad or loved one? I guess that we will never know that answer. I keep reliving my childhood and I find myself being taken back for some unknown reason... asking myself if I was a daughter that he was proud of? Does this happen with everyone in this situation? I keep feeling waves of regrets... about how I should of done this or that a little more, and I guess that is where I am taking a beating at the present time. I'm also feeling guilty because I wanted to fly down with my sisters to spend time with him, but the tickets are outrageous and I just don't have that kind of cash! Even though I tell my Dad that I love him, I really do and I pray that he never had to question the depth of my love or how I looked up to him! I pray that he knew I did! I will say that the devil does see this as a weak moment in these times of our life and he is so ever ready to pounce on us when we are at our lowest.


My prayer tonight is that you will remember my Dad in his final days of life and that somehow he will feel the arms of Jesus and his pain will be tolerable... and for the rest of the family and my mom that she will find strength in God as well until we are all able to get down to Florida to be with her.
I Love You Dad!

*A BIT OF HAPPY REMINISCING*

As I sat here this evening knowing what I wanted to blog about, the words just weren't coming to me that easy. So I started thinking about my kids and how they're growing up so fast and that sometimes they just know where, when and how to embarrass us when we least expect it! While I'm sitting here thinking, I am reminded of something that my daughter Katie now 8, so innocently said to me after bringing me a paper from her backpack. (was in kindergarten I believe) She said, Mama, I have a paper for you, will you read it? I said sure sweetie... so I sat down and I started reading it to myself like I usually do to know what I was reading before I would read something out loud to my kids. Well all of a sudden she kept putting her head/ear really close to me and I could hear her getting a little more agitated with each time she did this over again. Finally after about 5-7 times of her repeating this I said Katie, what in the world are you doing? Please let me finish reading this paper that you wanted me to read and then I'll give you some attention. And she said, well Mama I wanted you to read it to me and since you were reading it to yourself I was trying to see if I could listen to inside your head so I could hear what your head is saying about my paper. LOL That was all I needed for that day! I never would of thought that she would say that.... but it's true they will say the darnedest things when you least expect it. They may be ornery, tucker us out, and make us go gray, but I wouldn't want them any other way! I love to reminisce on the past experiences and events with my kids and when they also remember it, it makes it that much more memorable! It's fun to watch them grow up and develope into their own individual person, but it is also hard knowing that they don't stay little long. Gotta Love Em!!!

*HOW CLEARLY DO WE SEE?*

We were sitting in the doctors office waiting my my step-dad to finish and Kristofer and I were taking a few pictures of his eyes so that I could share and keep you updated. It will be 3 weeks Thursday since his second surgery, they don't bother him anymore but they still look pretty bad. Only time will tell if they will actually start working together for the first time. (It's in God's Hands) He keeps asking me why God had to give him eyes that don't work and that God must not like him since he gave him broken eyes. He doesn't always comprehend why or the answers I've tried to explain to him, so I told him that many people have things with their bodies that don't work the way they should for them and they matter to Jesus just as much as the people that were born with nothing wrong. I told him that Jesus loves him just the way he is no matter if his eyes work or not. This world can be so cruel and especially to how our children understand it to be. We will never quite measure up in the eyes of others. I guess there's been times in my own personal life I have felt that I fell short of deserving God's love or even acceptance from others...until I came to understand, that when I focused on what mattered most, I was able to clearly see that Jesus Loves me just the way I am and no matter if I trip and fall short, do wrong or how inadequate I might feel at times... He wouldn't love me any less! I pray that I measure up when God is adding up my score! Blessings To All!

*EVER HAVE ONE OF THESE DAYS*

Is this ever how some of you other moms out there think you might look or feel at times? Believe me, I sometimes can identify!!! Scary sight I know... and it also gives a whole new meaning to "having a bad hair day"! (I wonder why, LOL) I was thinking over todays events and it's funny because not only am I too young to be this forgetful, but I actually am having the hardest time remembering anything about it. So I came downstairs to clean my computer room, check emails, try to free up some space on my computer, (just might need to free up some space in my mind?) and do some browsing then I remembered I haven't posted a blog since Saturday. Well anyways before I remembered that I hadn't blogged in a couple days, I came across tons of pictures on my computer I didn't even know I had. Have any of you ever found something that you didn't know you had or was lost? (I love finding money in an old coat pocket or purse that was switched to match a different outfit) How they got saved there is beyond me and some have been on there according to the date, for 2 years. Now since I had a hard time remembering what I did today, (after sitting here a bit, I finally remembered) how fast paced it was and still trying to get ready for a big yard sale...I came across this picture and it kind of sums up how I felt today and how I know I must have looked last Friday when Kris was having his "Moments". Anyways, this pic did give me a few laughs and gave me a mental picture of myself that I really wouldn't want anyone or myself to ever see. LOL Now I'm off to try to catch some much needed ZZZZZ's Blessings to all!
P.S. Thanks to all for taking the time to read my blogs, I enjoy reading others as well ... this is a lot of fun and it's another relaxing downtime for me!

*DINNER AND A MOVIE*

Ok, so I have been thinking for the past several weeks now that when my kids are with their dad on the weekends, I should do something for myself... well at least once in awhile! (I miss them and I'm usually at home every weekend their gone) After weeks of trying to figure out what to do, I finally decided that ever since I saw "Wild Hogs" was first advertised I have wanted to see it and I finally decided to "just do it." So my mom asked me to come over for dinner (yes it was my mom I had my date with,"if you will") and then off to the Quaker we went. Aside from the sexual comments and cursing, it was a pretty funny flick, with a lot of funny happenings. My kids have been wanting to see it too and I am glad I didn't take them because I think it had too much adult content for them. Sometimes I wish they would just make movies without foul language in it at all. The night Tim Hawkins came to NewPointe, we were doubled over with laughter... and he brought good clean materials to share. Thanks Tim! I can't wait till he comes back! I just wish that we could have more movies with little or no inappropriate content. Katie has been wanting to see the movie about a mouse that starts with the letter R... I can say it, just can't remember how to spell it. LOL Tomorrow Kyle comes home from Church Camp and I pick the other two up from their dads. And then we start it all over again come Monday morning. :-) I am still trying to get ready for my much overdue yard sale...I might have more gray hairs, but it would be over with and who's counting anyways? LOL Not much else happening in my neck of the wood, what about yours? Blessings, Leslie

*MAKING SOME CHANGES*

Just a real quick update. I have changed the name of my blog. It is now MUSIC FROM THE HEART.. it was SINGING LIKE NOBODY'S LISTENING. I had some time to work with it and now I just need to get it designed... which might take like forever! Anyways, I hope you all have a gr8 weekend! Blessings, Leslie :-)

*THANK GOODNESS IT'S FRIDAY*

Wow! Today started off rather fast and I found myself racing to beat the clock to 9am. Kyle was pumped up and ready to go to youth camp with the rest of the Army Of One campers. I was wanting to be there a little before 9 but that being on time thingy , doesn't that only happens in the world of make believe or dreams? LOL Well come to find out the arrival time was 9:30 and takeoff was at 10, all of a sudden I found myself being able to breathe, or at least breathe a little easier... until I am reminded that I have Kris and Katie with me. Being that Kris has Autism/Asperger's Syndrome/PDD/ADHD/ODD, (PDD is also another form of Autism) I thought just maybe that he would be alright until I got to see Kyle leave for camp. NOT SO! It completely sent him into a tail spin, he was totally out of his element and I am almost sure that everyone there most likely noticed it. There are so many different forms of Autism and Kris happens to have the high functioning form. He is verbal and does speak clearly, but sometimes he says things just because he has heard them before but he has no idea what he's said. Also his Perceptual Language has always been a problem. (what you say to him is so often not comprehended and what he says doesn't always make sense) He has difficulty expressing himself appropriately and gets upset when misunderstood! He has always lacked social, emotional, self help and behavior skills. People aren't always understanding to him and they think that he is a really bad boy. (and yes I have been told that) I have been told to keep my child on a leash or in a cage to teach him right and wrong. At first it was so hard to take the stares, whispers and rude comments, but I soon came to figure out that it was because people were uneducated and the negativity was their way of" if you will"- dealing with it. Over the past 9 years through all the poems and songs I have penned, it has always been difficult for me to put into words this child of mine that I see everyday struggle so hard to just fit in and be accepted. A few months back the words that I have wanted to say for years just came to me from out of the blue. I have titled this poem "MY SPECIAL GIFT"

Let me tell you of my son named Kristofer,
he has 1 big brother and 1 little sister.
He was born a very healthy baby boy,
the first time I held him I felt such joy!
Something went wrong when he was two,
sometimes I was confused at what to do.
Many times his eyes just held blank stares,
I wondered if he was really even there.
He was often off in a world all of his own,
I was so clueless as to what was wrong.
The world where we live is so big and bright
but his world exist of only black and white.
At times he can't say what's on his mind,
searches for the words,yet he cannot find.
We have some good days but they are so few,
I'd get overwhelmed not knowing what to do.
There's so many things he just wants to say,
but I know that his words just get in the way.
I see the very bright little boy that I have,
as so misunderstood and even called bad.
In his own time-I might get a kiss or hug,
it's difficult for him to know and accept love.
Almost everywhere we go we do find,
that people can be so cruel and unkind.
The careless whispers and pointing fingers,
leave painful memories that always linger.
I'm used to all the comments and stares,
since they seem to follow us everywhere.
He's always left out when it's time to play,
he asks me-"why do I have to be this way,
please Mama, can you make this all go away,
I don't want to be Autistic anymore and just
please turn me back to the way I was before"?
Sometimes I really want to take his place,
I try to hold him and make him feel safe.
Although he don't think like we all do,
he's a real person with real feeling too.
I believe a cure will be found here one day,
until then I'll be thankful, trust and pray.
You see I love my son that many think is odd,
he is my special gift sent to me from God.

Written By: Leslie Holloway
March 21, 2007

P.S. I apologize for the long blog... Blessings To All! Leslie

*YA THINK SUMMER'S FINALLY HERE*

The 3 main reasons why I get
up every day! (They are worth it!)




Katie

Kyle

Kris

This trampoline was one of the best investments that I made last summer. They've even tried to sleep out on it, imagine that? We've laid out and watched the stars at night... one move and we all slid to the center. It was
a crazy idea, but we had fun!



I can't believe how fast this school year went. I mean where did the time go? I also keep asking myself if I got everything accomplished that I wanted to during the school year... and I guess NO would be the correct answer! (it didn't take me long to figure that one out) So last Friday I thought- well I am going to let the kids have 1 week of sleeping in till about 9am, (I was really thinking for me at that moment) :-) but sleeping in for my kids is well- not sleeping in at all (7a-8a- if I'm the least bit lucky) so very early in this thinking process that idea got put aside, but I still had high hopes... if you know what I mean? Then to top it all off Kyle, who is now officially a "Freshmen" told me last Friday of all days especially after I had already thought, and I mean just thought- came to me and said, "Oh by the way mom, I start marching band bright and early Monday morning from 8-12... and it is JUST for 1 week and then we will start back up again the end of July. I think that the look on my face must of been priceless, because priceless is just the look he gave me after he finished telling me his "good news" and then my moment of silence that followed. He just couldn't wait till he was able to start marching band. He has talked about it since the 5th grade when he started playing trombone. And yes I felt guilty for just thinking about sleeping in when he was so excited about something he's anticipated for 4 years for to finally arrive. I love U Kyle (if he would see this before I posted it, he'd for sure try to persuade against it) I will post pics with him in his uniform at a later time. I guess I'd better update on Kris and Katie as well. Kristofer is now a 5th grader. It has been 2 weeks today since his corrective eye surgery for Strabismus. (A visual defect in which one eye cannot focus with the other eye on an object because of imbalance of the eye muscles- American Heritage Dictionary.) The surgery went well and the Doc says it will take awhile to fully heal. He isn't in any kind of pain, but it isn't pleasant to look at and you might think otherwise. He will be going back to Camp Nuhop for his 5th summer. (Nuhop Camp for experimental learning and developmental disabilities www.campnuhop.org) I believe he will also be going to Summer camp with the church. As for Katie, she is now a 3rd grader. She is doing better with her Asthma. She just really has to be monitored since she is still learning how to cope and with the warning signs. She too will be going to Summer camp with the church. We are going to try to take a couple road trips to Ronoake Virginia to see my brother and his family and get the cousins together and I would like to go back to Indiana to see one of my old girlfriends. But I really need to finish organizing for my yard sale that I need to have no later than June 28-30. Well in closing I might add that through the hustle of our busy life we have a lot to be thankful for. And I thank God for the 3 children He has entrusted me with and that He allows me to get up each day and choose to serve Him and teach my kids the importance of being a follower of Christ. Have a great day and Blessings to all! Leslie :-)

*Something To Really Think About*

When I stop and really think about the number of people in this world today that suffer daily from depression or feeling inadequate... the statistics are alarming! There has been times in everyones life where we don't feel that were good enough, we don't add up or we give up even before trying. There really are people out there that don't love or care about us, make us feel like we don't add up, or that we will never be good enough. Maybe somewhere in their life there was no one that loved them or tried to make a difference! The world can never give to us what Our Heavenly Father has already given us when He offered up His only Son Jesus! Love! Peace! Freedom! We are human and we do have feelings that get hurt once in awhile, but how we choose to let the ones that hurt us affect our lives is what really matters. I believe that God felt pain when Jesus died to take away any kind of sin or pain we might have. I've personally dwelt with so many different levels of pain in my life that you would think that I could be numb to any kind of feelings. WRONG! The truth is that even though it hurts and at times when I want to throw in the towel and don't want to try something over again... what I decide to do will either make or break me, and I don't have to decide it alone! I am glad that even though I personally have felt great waves of pain my entire life, I believe that God has used it in some way to shape me to who I am today. Sometimes I don't understand how and I don't want to admit at the time that this is part of life, but as time passes I can say that I totally get how and why it happened! God says that He will not put more on us than we can handle and I believe that He knows we are stronger than we give ourselves credit for, otherwise He wouldn't allow us to face the difficult times. I want Him to mold and make me so that my lifesong will sing for Him even if the during my journey I do get a little "broken" up. It makes me think about a line in the song "Better"... but in the end- what leaves you broken- in the end - makes you better! I pray that in the times of my life that I am broken, it will make me better for the cause of Christ! Let's try to make a difference in the life of someone in need!

*What is Rest?*

Okay, so just when I think that I might be on a roll and I think I'm ready to start pricing things for this long anticipated yard sale, I am all to soon brought back to reality and faced with the fact that I am only really just about a 1/4 of the way through all of the things that I thought there was to price or sort through. I just want to take it all and load it up and head off to the local dump or even better yet out to my aunt and uncles and pile it high and then set it ablaze... and if I weren't too awful tired to forget the hotdogs, roasting sticks, buns, condiments and all the other fixin's, we might have us a good old weinee roast! But I can't see that happening anytime soon. Oh well, I am definatly not going to get it done overnight and the next night don't look promising either! So I will just have to be patient and get done what I can.... only so many hours in one day, this was soposed to be done last summer and before I knew it time had gotten away with me yet again. I am gonna stop stressing about it and do what I can... and get some much needed ZZZZZZ's, which sounds like a plan to me! I know that my body and mind might thank me for if I would just let it happen. I want to make sure that my heart and mind is open and rested enough for when God speaks to me and in alone time with Him so with His help I am able to do whatever He has for me to do that day. Tomorrow is another day, I think I will price more then. :-)

*NEWBIE TO BLOGGING*

I believe that this is a first for me, so please bear with me. (Newbie here LOL) It has been one of those days where it looked as if it was waiting to storm all day. The sun didn't shine and it looked so dull outside. My kids are with their father this weekend and to keep from being constantly reminded that I will be alone for 3 days during the holiday, I tried to keep busy with things that have been put off long enough. (I really do miss my kids when they are gone) There are winter clothes to put away, summer clothes to be pulled out and washed and put into closets and dressers, but sometimes just the thought of tackling it all alone made me just not want to do it at all. But.... the kids need their summer clothes and I've procrastinated long enough. I also know my father is in his last few months of life and although I want so bad to talk to him and see him everyday, I know that it isn't humanly possible with him living way down in Florida. It is so hard to either catch him at home and if and when I do I realize this might be the last time I get to hear his voice and I sometimes find myself putting off calling him till later and when later comes it is too late to call at all. Again I had procrastinated. Sitting here writing this I am reminded that sometimes when we procrastinate too long, we might never again get a second chance to make that first move when we had the opportunity. One thing that I want to be is more organized and disciplined! (OK maybe not organized having kids, but for sure more disciplined) I seem to have so many things going on all at once and I feel so scatterbrained that not one of the things I started is even close to being completed. I think that this is a lesson for me and all of us might benefit from... Maybe just start 1 thing at a time, stick with it till it is done. God doesn't want us to run ragged through life with it flying right by and be too busy to take the time to stop, and really listen to what he is saying and what he wants us. I don't want to procrastinate when it comes to my alone time with Him, it is my opportunity to gain strength to get through the rough times and time to let His Son shine in my life. So... even if the day looks dark and gloomy and the sun isn't shinning outside... God's love can shine through and I don't have to let "things" keep me from beaming inside! I can't make it without Jesus in my life and the longer we procrastinate and put off a daily walk with him, spiritual growth is nonexistent. Many blessings to all!